Need some advice / help

Greetings everyone! First of all, I want to say that english is not my native language (I'm russian speaking from Ukraine) so it will be a lot of mistakes here, so sorry for that.

I wanted to ask people around here if you can help me to find some remote job. I lost my job 1 year ago and after that I tried to find something new and useful for me but all I found it's only a depression and deep apathy. There is a lot of vacancy that requires 3-5 years of some experience and I have no idea why this works like that... Because almost no one offers on-the-job training (I'm talking about remote work). I thought about starting to learn some programming language or 3D modeling but I need money now and I'm not sure that I have 3+/- years to just learn something new and only after that to start earn some money.

So what can I do? For real I am not a super pro in something. I worked later as assistent in AutoCAD but it was not a big deal, because I did only some easy stuff. Some time I worked as administrator in gaming club. I'm well versed in video games (especially retro games on Sega Genesis & NES) and even tried to stream on twitch but I don't think that I like that because I'm not a clown and I don't like to scream and show fake emotions. I'm not super serious but considering to others fake persons I was a dull to them. And because I'm a girl and a lot of users just wanted to see me more happier and even more dumber..like a casual stupid girl. So I quit and not because of that I mentioned before but because I started to feel a hole inside of me and I just didn't wanted to show myself on stream or talk. I knew that I'm a failure and I knew that I need a lot of time to learn something that can give me some money. Yes, I know that I just needed to start to learn but when I thought that all my life I just will be sitting in front of my damn monitor to learn something I started to feel apathy again... Nothing will be brighter in my life... Of course it was a lot of thoughts about suicide and even now but I want to try to find some good job and just feel calmly about everything. I spend the last days in my village to be more further from people... It's a real tranquility to me but when I came back to town and I know again that I need to do something with my life.

So...if someone of you guys know some remote work with some practice ( I can learn 3 months for sure) I will be very grateful. Thanks!